The Mall Santa
by DJ The Sonic Nerd
Summary: Sort-of Sequel to 'The Shirt'. Danny thought that becoming his local mall's Santa would help him keep his promise to cheer up around the holidays. He came to instantly wish he blasted the application Sam gave him when he had the chance. (Post PP, One-shot)


**_I would have posted this last night, but my doc manager stopped working. Luckily, I found a work around though, so I'm back on track._**

 ** _Here I am, with the sequel no one requested to my mildly popular thing from Halloween, 'The Shirt'. There's no need to go and read that one for anything in here unless you want to._**

 ** _Originally, I wasn't planning on making more of these holiday themed one shots, but inspiration hit, so I wanted to make this a little series. I was tired when I wrote both of these. I think that helped me in retrospect._**

The Mall Santa

"So, uh… what do YOU want for Christmas... 'little girl'…?"

"How about we cut the present talk and YOU get in my stocking tonight, Fenton…?"

"Paulina, this is the sixth time you've come up here just to ask me that in the past half hour... I have a girlfriend and you know it."

* * *

When Sam first shoved the application into his face a week or two before that fateful night, Danny was optimistic. Hesitant, and was considering himself one of the worst people for the job, but nonetheless optimistic. The job helped all parties involved, gave Danny a little extra cash, didn't clash too much with prior responsibilities (all he had to do was show up a few hours on Christmas Eve after all. Didn't even clash with school because he was off by then.) and could potentially be a fun time, if a little on the slow and boring side. Plus the Christmas truce festivities were in full swing already, so not only would ghosts leave him alone, but he had a good time in the Ghost Zone to look forward to after.

The reality was that becoming a mall Santa for a bunch of last minute shoppers quickly became one of Danny's regrets in life.

For starters, his costume. Surprisingly too small for a supposedly teen sized Santa costume (he wondered for a while after getting hired how he got a job posing as Santa with a small frame like his), smelled like little kid, looked like someone threw up on AND in it, and he was pretty sure the hat had lice because he sporadically was itching at his head all throughout his shift. And the beard, DO NOT get him started on the beard. Smelled like something died inside of a sludge processing plant… don't ask how he knows what that smells like.

He also had to be in his ghost form the entire time. Not that he minded this, but he preferred preserving his energy for later in the night by staying human. The sole reason for this requirement was for the white hair, and after he refused hair dye and a wig that clearly had a rabid squirrel nesting in it, being Phantom was the best alternative.

The venue sucked too. Instead of a nicely crafted throne on top of a staircase surrounded by elves to keep kids from getting too rowdy, he had a small, broken down rocking chair on the ground with only the surrounding velvet ropes as protection from the broods of evil, demonic little brats or whackos and ghost hunters that weren't his parents, the two terms of course being interchangeable.

And he was on his own. NO ONE wanted to be an elf this year. This was a very bad thing.

Definitely one of the low points of the job was actually doing the job itself. Yes, the little kids were cool. Quite a few of them recognized him and simply wanted a picture with him in addition to saying their Christmas wishes and were on their way. Even some of the greedier ones were pretty chill overall.

Oh, but his fellow teens…? Dear Clockwork, the teens…

Danny had no idea teens and adults were even ALLOWED to go onto a mall Santa's lap. In all of his time being busy with his Christmas resentment, he had never taken the time to notice. But now he did notice, and he regretted ever knowing.

Sam and Tucker showed up once, both showing moral support when they saw what only an hour of the shift was doing to the poor kid's mental state. He was already dipping back into his old surly holiday attitude, no matter how much he fought it, and everything around him was starting to drive him insane. This, combined with the constant energy drain from maintaining his ghost form, was physically and mentally exhausting him.

Valerie gave it a go, and they ended up having an uncomfortable conversation about his mortality until a kid got sick of waiting in line and threw a candy cane into his eye. Because that was fun.

Many a violent fangirl had to be carried out by mall security at some point or another.

But by far, the worst of all of them was Paulina.

It started about two hours in, around 9:00 at night with an hour to go, and Danny was getting pretty tired. His head and eyes started unconsciously drooping, his transformative ring flickering from exhaustion. The kid standing next in line had to shake him awake when he passed out for a solid five minutes, almost shifting back into human form and getting himself caught by his employers.

"Mr. Phantom…?"

"T… Ten more minutes, Sam, gotta burn the ugly reindeer marshmallow…"

The girl sighed, and Danny's head shot up at an almost neck-breaking speed when she walked up to him and smacked him clean across the face in order to rouse him.

"I-I'M AWAKE!" Danny screamed in surprise, eyes wide with his arms slightly flailing. Many of the shoppers nearby the area stopped and looked at him like he was crazy, getting a sheepish smile out of him.

Unfortunately, the outburst attracted the nearby attention of Paulina, out getting a few things as stocking stuffers for herself with her 'Christmas Eve' money, not to be confused with the large sum she would get the following day. Though it was clear he was in a relationship with Sam, Paulina insisted on pining for his affection every chance she got. Danny winced as he heard her shriek his name and groaned as soon she was pushing through a crowd of little kids to get to the halfa. She placed herself delicately on his lap, and he had to fight the urge to phase her off of him.

"Hi, Danny…" Paulina said in a seductive tone, making it hard for Danny to keep a straight face. The manager of the mall (i.e. his boss, who didn't care if Danny was a superhero so long as he was doing his current job) was right there watching him, so Danny couldn't just tell her to leave him alone; he had to do his whole routine.

"H-Hello, little girl," Danny choked out, knowing Paulina wasn't one of the many five year olds he was usually dealing with. "What would you like for Christma-"

"Cut the script and come back with me to my place tonight, Danny… I have a special present just for you…" Paulina said, her slightly creepy tone never leaving her voice.

He really didn't want to know what in her mind constituted as a 'special present'.

"Pass," Danny hissed under his breath with the guise of a fake smile. His boss nodded and left him alone at last. He sighed, and relaxed into a look of indifference. "Can we talk about this later? There's a bunch of people waiting in line," he pleaded.

"Fine. I'll come back later," she surprisingly said, not putting up any sort of fight. She simply got up and left to go to another point in the store. Danny felt incredibly relieved that he wouldn't have to deal with her for a little while…

...or at least he was until she showed five minutes later, pushing off the little boy on Danny's lap and making him cry before planting herself back down.

"Paulina, I said later!"

"It is later," she said, unfazed by the increasingly frustrated look growing on Danny's face. His 'scary eyes' were just shy of showing themselves, but he calmed himself down beforehand.

"Paulina. Later," Danny said firmly.

And this cycle repeated itself four more times, each new time creating a new feeling of frustration in Danny. By the time the last half hour of his shift rolled around, he was ready to snap. And Paulina going closer and closer to his face with her lips puckered wasn't helping.

"That does it!" Danny finally yelled, ripping off his beard, throwing down his hat (and itching his head a few times), and transforming back to human. His anger and exhaustion was now overwhelming and he couldn't take the stressful environment anymore.

"I can't take this anymore! I quit!"

* * *

"And that's only one of the scenarios I came up with! Taking this job wouldn't be a good idea, dude."

Inside of the living room inside Fenton Works, Danny sat drowsily on his couch, listening to Tucker drone on and on about why becoming the mall's Santa wasn't the best job in the world for him. The technogeek prepared various charts and diagrams for the occasion, none of which were really swaying Danny's decision.

"Tuck, I'm pretty sure handling a bunch of little kids wouldn't kill me. Plus I'm great with kids," Danny said simply, stifling a yawn. It was late December 23rd and he needed to get rest for tomorrow if he wanted to be in tiptop shape. "Your impression of me needs work, by the way," he finished, sitting up and giving a slight wince at the lamp when he saw it in his peripheral vision.

"And if you ever make me dress like Paulina again…" Sam slugged Tucker in the arm hard, dressed in a homemade Paulina outfit to better demonstrate his thoughts, "I'll come to your house in the middle of the night and dunk one of your PDAs in hot sauce and boiling oil"

"Ow!"

"Whatever happens, I'm sure it won't be as bad as that, Tuck," Danny said, heading towards the stairs as Sam and Tucker decided to head home. After they said their goodbyes and left, Danny headed up to his room and quickly fell asleep, ready for what was to come in the new day.

He just wished that he had the Paulina thing actually happen instead of his dad not recognizing him and thinking he was an actual Santa is all.


End file.
